Blog Archives - Rebecca Chin Life's Story...

It's supposed to get easier?

8/30/2014

I know, life goes on. So people say...and to a certain sense, it does. And I guess it's harder around this time of the year because it's so easy to re-live what happened exactly two years ago. Not sure why I'm having a harder time this year as opposed to last year??

And I'm hoping it will get easier as time goes on. Maybe I should just allow myself one week a year to feel sad. It's way too depressing and hard to deal with....so after 9/1, I'll shake this off and be happy.....until next year...right?

Two years ago - BWH ED

8/27/2014

So here we are, two years ago I brought my Mom to BWH's ED. Again, the road to her last trip ever. I know I mentioned in previous posts that I should celebrate her life. But it's almost impossible. I'm sorry. This week is tough to bear but I'll get through it......surrounding myself with memories of her enjoying life, always making the best of things, dishing out advice, savoring her favorite foods, tossing food away not to her liking, shopping, singing and talking to her brother from HK daily!

How is it possible - Old guys at the club know their designers?? WTHell?

8/24/2014

Dad was looking for some short-sleeved shirts for the summer. So Nancy bought him a couple of Tommy Hilfiger ones which didn't elicit any comments from his buddies at the club. Yet I just bought him a "Ben Sherman" shirt and his boys were so impressed! They really liked it and asked him where he got it from. He proudly told them his daughter bought it for him...I can totally see him bragging about it.

Never in a million years, would I have thought Dad and I would have this type of relationship! I enjoy him so much more now. I wish and hope everyone out there reading this blog (188 strong this past Saturday!) have this experience with one or both of your parents!! It is so lovely.....don't know how else to describe it.

Need to keep busy

8/23/2014

Trying to stay busy so I don't get caught up with all of the emotions that will surface inevitably. Not trying to suppress it but more like trying to deal. I know people say it gets easier as time goes by but I'm not finding it to be true yet. And one day I hope to say so. Not this year tho.

Work is busy as we are looking to double our office space! Very exciting....

Also new is I'm organizing a book/cd/dvd drive for the residents of South Cove Manor - Chinese nursing home in Quincy. Still in the preliminary stages and working out the logistics. But definitely an awesome opportunity and looking forward to helping out in whatever capacity I can. I'm doing this cos this is what my Mom started and I can't wait to meet some new "Aunties and Uncles" soon.

Too cute for words

8/22/2014

So I went out last night and asked my Dad if he needed a ride home from Chinatown on my way home. And he said no cos he was staying home. So around 10:45pm, I see two missed calls from my Dad and got worried that something bad happened. I called him and he asked if I was home yet cos he knew I was going out. He said it's 10:30pm so I should go home because it's late and I need to go to work the next day!! OMGoodness!?! He hardly ever calls me at night. And if he was out, he probably wouldn't be worried. It was just too cute and made me feel like I was a teenager.

Tho I'm a little bit worried he may be sad and staying home because of the "day." But I'll keep a close eye on him and see how he does.

Don't be sad...

8/17/2014

One of my Mom's oldest friend wanted to visit my Mom. So my Dad and I brought her to the cemetery and then went to lunch afterwards. She told me how my Mom helped her by advising not to take things too seriously and that things will always get better. She also told me and my Dad not to be sad - cos Mom wasn't like that and probably wouldn't want us to be this way. Not in those exact words as I can't translate it literally! Sorry.....

Wow, Mom really touched a lot of people. I just wish I had more time with her so I can tell her how much I appreciated her. I just pray that she hears me now.

Saying goodbye to memories

8/14/2014

A couple of weeks ago, my basement flooded. I got about a foot of water so 90% of my photo albums that were in tote containers were knocked over and got soaked. I had about 10-12 Sanrio albums!! I was able to salvage some pictures but the majority of them had to be thrown out. It was kinda sad (recurring theme here, I know) but at the same time, I was thinking maybe it's all about starting over and letting go.

I don't know and maybe I'll feel better about the anniversary coming up. Maybe I won't get too emotional on the "day." Maybe I won't read too much into the significance of the anniversary and not think about standing in front of her casket and saying my final goodbye. And maybe I won't cry every time I hear the songs I associate with her passing. Yea, right and maybe there'll be world peace.

Another sign?

8/10/2014

Maybe I'm reading too much into this but I asked for another sign from my Mom late last night. Just needed some reassurance....so I'm dreaming that I have a ticket to a Prince concert at a small local high school in Roxbury?? And I'm standing outside thinking do I really want to go in by myself? Not exactly sure why I was there alone but then I turned around and there was my mom with a ticket in hand! I'm like how did you get here? And she said she had a headache but wanted to be there with me. What the hell? I don't even like Prince and not sure if she did either. But she came regardless of her headache and lack of transportation. She found a way to be there for me. There's a morale to this dream and I'll let you come up with your own conclusions. But I got my sign :) Thanks, MOM!

Crazy shit

8/6/2014

I blog about my life after my mom's passing cos I want to continue to chronicle my journey in honor of her. I know people are still viewing the site up to 135 hits at any given day!! Could be family, friends and perhaps people who knew my Mom?!? And I'm sure folks share the link to this site for whatever reason...but I sincerely hope it's with good intentions. I would hate for anyone to use this site to cause trouble...this would be disrespectful to my Mom. So please do NOT use this site for your personal vendettas. Feel free to contact me if you have a problem with my blog.